the things we used to do

I should be totally working on my two papers or studying for my midterm tm, but of course of all times i need to really be hitting the books...i'd rather be writing my thoughts. LAME BRAIN. Anyway,..... I was just thinking back within these past five years and how its all winding down to an end soon before we can even blink our eyes. I'm getting quite nervous just as every college graduate should be feeling but i think i'm more nervous of how much i'll miss this college life as opposed to whats really going to happen to me in the long run and will I continue to pursue this career ive chosen. But God's working in mysterious ways, and i'll continue to let him guide me to which ever way he desires. I always talk about how things were back then and how much I miss them but i think the simple things in life ...ESPECIALLY in college is something that i'll def miss...amongst them would probably be:

1. Having so much leisure time to be able to nap and not feel like youve wasted half your day.

2. stay up late and wake up early..go to class on 2 hours of sleep

3. eat whenever, wherever, however

4. freedom to go to everyone you know and go to school with because they all live around you

5. being able to go cray on a thursday knowing no school friday.

6. having so much alone time and being able to gather thoughts

7. finding your true self slowly..but surely.

8. this isnt even what i planned on writing on but somehow ended up coming up with a list i had no intentions for, so before i go into typical lames, i'll end it here and continue into a more further in depth post on my 5 years of undergrad college life, probably after I walk this MAY!

experience with the right people.

One of the many many things I've learned growing up is that no matter where you are and no matter how amazing or paradise like the place or thing can be, it can not be satisfied or live up to its "greatness" unless you are with the greatest people. And that no matter how many times i've tried to convince myself that isnt true, it seems to only prove me wrong every single time.

I could be in hawaii with the best view, most relaxing sounds, amazing eye candy on the beach, but if im not with the right people...no happiness could amount to what I've expected the turn out to be. I could be ballin' with a milli milli dollas in my hands and rollin through with a range rover, but if i had nobody to share that with or spend it with, no happiness could be accentuated upon that feeling.

It pretty much goes to say that, it doesnt matter how much money or materialistic things you have..if you dont have anyone to share or spend it with, everything is useless. Needless to say, if you dont have the RIGHT type of people to share the experience with, you pretty much dont have an experience to remember.

gave back in.

oh my, its been a long time here and i know you loyals have been quite disappointed. Apologies to the max, ive been busy and had a bunch of brain farts within the time being i was M.I.A. I was gonna shut this whole blog down, but i guess i can never really just give up on it. Ive been writing in my journal..NO, not diary..a journal, same as a blog but in a book instead....and if you can find it on me, feel free to read just dont tell me. haha but i guess i am back for whenever i do need some ventilation..here goes my first post back, just a short quote that really just lies straight to the truth...and to know to never, ever trust anyone and know where your loyalty stands.

"Always question where your loyalty lies. The people you trust will expect it, your greatest enemies will desire it and those you treasure the most will, without fail, abuse it."

you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere....

i know i should probably start on my paper thats due tomorrow but i feel like eh, my brains way too fried from this mornings 715 final...So instead i'll take the time to release some unnecessary crap thats stuck on my chest AND back.

TOP TEN "You know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere"....:

10) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when the boss has to take your phones away from you in the beginning of every shift because your idiotic coworkers decide to be buried in their phones instead of serving customers.

9) You know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when your coworkers add you on facebook but never say hi to you when you work with them let alone seeing them outside of work.

8) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when you see your coworkers outside of work and they try to act like they dont know you but hit you up with the quickness when they need a shift covered.

7) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when 75% of your coworkers has hooked up with each other. World's cleanest recycling bin.

6) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when theres always one person whose the main juice of the day to talk about at work no matter what day of the week it is.

5) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when your coworkers start rumors that don't even make sense just because they can't be on their level of CRACKINNESSSSSS.

4) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when you still use the word CRACKINNESSSSS.

3) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when for christmas secret santa on elfster, your coworker has no shame and wishes for a gstring/bra set..how professional.

2) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when your coworker is putting up stickers of themselves promoting their bodies, half naked on your work walls.

1) you know you work in a frikin high school atmosphere when.......theres not one shift when alcohol, drugs, partying, and ecstasy is not brought up between coworkers. STD, thizz iz what it iz my nigg, hyphyhyphy, high school life ALL OVER AGAIN. YAY.

a real friend.

pic via from shannon's blog:

a real friend..understanding more to the fact that sex and money are not the main keys to a friendship and life but how far they'd go the distance during an unexpected time.

girlsarethenewboys.

She done did it again, took the words right outta my brain and put it into words. An entry from ABI.

You ever watch a movie and swear you’re the only one in the theater, and they’re specifically talking to orabout you? That’s how I felt during the scene in Friends With Benefits when the following conversation between Jaime (Mila) and Dylan (JT) ensued:

Jamie: Look, I know that I act all tough and I talk all tough, but really…
Dylan: It’s just a front to protect yourself from your own vulnerability.

To which I have only two things to say to the FWB screenwriters, “F YOU,” and “Where’s my royalties?” Because I swear I’ve been incepted.

It’s not so much that I pretend to be tough, I just pretend as if I don’t care. At all. I have this nonchalant act down to such an art, that I won’t even tell you I’m leaving when really I just want to lay in bed with you all day. Then I expect you to know exactly how I feel. Of course I do.

You see when it comes to relationships, it’s extremely difficult for me to talk about my feelings. Not too sure why, I’m a woman. I thought it’s what we were born to do. But when it comes to telling someone how I feel, I kind of rather burn my hair instead.

But what can I say? I’m stubborn. It’s not that I’m a slow learner. It’s just that things never seem to make sense, or permeate until I learn the HARD WAY. Which means yes – making the same mistake twice … thrice, and if I knew how to say it past three I would. I still agree that some things are better left unsaid, especially when you’re just beating a dead horse. What it comes down to is WHY. Why do you feel the need to have that talk? To send that email? To send that text? If it’s in an attempt to change the other person’s mind about a current situation you’re probably better off leaving it alone. But you can never go wrong when you do things solely for yourself.

You can also never go wrong with stating your intentions as soon as you know them, and being honest about your feelings from the jump. You can hold out in hopes that the feelings will just go away, or at the very least save face. However, it will never worth the tears that fall down your face when you realize you should’ve said something sooner.

Satisfaction

Satisfaction 04:

Losing something that means so much to you while being absent minded =( and having it come back to you. #bestfeelingever.